Slippin'

Is been a while since I blogged, I'm slippin and need to check myself.

So let's see.... The possession of me continues,  and it's new and fun and now has a goal.   Not saying much about this right now because...

Someone came back, again.  I honestly thought it would be different this time around,  but its not,  with an exception of a bunch of lip service.

He's still controlling,  he's still uptight, he still places high value on his job and less value on love and living life.

The one good thing that's different is,  It didn't reduce me to tears this time, because I'm stronger & this is HIS loss.   He's aware.  A HUGE change this time around is that,  I know my worth.

You see,  while he "slept on me", I was busy rediscovering me.   I was busy healing myself.   I was finding the greatness within me. I am inimitable,  there is no one like me.   I'm special and now I'm strong,  not just externally,  but most importantly internally.

The one question he needed to answer,  he dismissed without a second thought despite the warning that he's losing me.   Seriously?   If he cannot appreciate me,  my time,  my attention, he simply does not deserve to have it.

My assessment is that he's STILL very much an emotional infant. Hes not evolving,  he's not growing,  he's not advancing and I'm tired of waiting.  He has two failed relationships under his belt,  I'm sure because of his inflexibility and unwillingness to change,  to grow,  to evolve.   He knows there is something very special,  very different to us and he's taking it for granted.

I cannot continue this dance,  I deserve better. He knows it,  I know it.   If he doesn't treasure this ..... why should I?

Again,  he's lost me.

What's crazy is, each time this happens,  I get stronger.   As I get stronger,  I get closer to finding what I'm looking for.   To finding the part of my life that will further enhance what I already have.

And once that's found,  he will cease to exist to me.....